Chapter 6 – Kiss the Cook

“Oh! Eri, Hopper, can I see you real quick?” Lisa beckons us the moment we enter, like she was patiently waiting for our arrival.

“Morning, Lisa.” Hopper takes the initiative in greeting today. “What’s up?”

She smiles wide and digs through her desk. “Rather than tell you, I’ll show you what’s up…” She pulls out a pair of metal shells. They’re shaped like our badges, but with a blue sheen instead of the plain silver ours have. “Ta-da! We just wrapped up our monthly reviews, and you two qualified for promotion!”

“For real?! We’re D-Rank now?” Wait, did she say monthly? Today’s October 5^th, and we became adventurers on September 5^th, so that’s a whole month already. I can’t believe I’ve been living with Hopper for that long.

Lisa sets the alloys down on the table and looks through a few drawers. “Well, not technically. Promotion is voluntary, so we’d need your okay first. Once we have your permission, thoug-”

“Yes, yes! A million times yes! We’d like to promote! Right, Hopper?!”

“Um, yeah, I think!” What? ‘I think’?

She laughs at our enthusiasm. “That simplifies things. Here, sign on the line when you’re ready.” She slides a pair of orange slips of paper to us.

As much as I want to scribble my name in instantly… “Hopper, are you ready to promote?” I’m sure it’s just Hopper being Hopper, but his hesitation is concerning. I don’t want to pressure him to sign anything if he’s not ready. I’ve already pushed him into enough craziness as is.

“Y-Yeah! Can’t get closer to your dream without promoting, so let’s do it!” Typical Hopper answer.

“Forget about me for a second. You didn’t seem confident in the decision, so I’m asking you genuinely: do you want to promote?”

He doesn’t answer right away, thankfully. This dummy can’t help but rush into every decision; I need to help him slow down for the big stuff. “Sorry, I was just caught off guard. I’m ready to promote, honest.”

I can’t help but smile. “In that case…” I quickly sign on the dotted line. “Let’s do our best in D-Rank, partner.”

“Y-Yes! Let’s!” He slowly writes out his name in print. I suppose his grandfather wouldn’t have given him robust writing lessons, but his handwriting is frankly a little nicer than mine…

“Oh, so cute~!” A familiar voice calls out from near the mission room.

“Welcome to D-Rank, Team Earshot.” A less interested voice speaks beside it.

“Good morning, and thank you.” Of course, it was Rosemary and Samuel. “Has nobody ever told you not to eavesdrop?”

Rosemary responds with a dismissive shrug. “Eavesdrop smeavesdrop. We figured you’d hit D-Rank today too, so we waited.”

“O-Oh! You guys also ranked up?” While I’m mildly agitated if anything, Hopper seems a bit embarrassed that they were watching us.

They both dig their new blue badges out of their bags, displaying them proudly. “Hard work pays off.” Samuel must have thought that line was real smooth, but let’s not forget that he was doing the same mundane item retrieval missions that we were.

…seemed to work on Hopper, though, judging by the twinkle in his eye.

“In case you forgot, D-Rank means fancier badges, missions beyond the forest, rescue missions, and most importantly-”

“Taxes.”

Rosemary playfully shakes Samuel’s shoulder. “That too, sunshine, but alsoooooooo…” She had been holding something behind her back this entire time, which she finally reveals to us. “Team-Up Missions!” She presents a mission flier, though this one is written on brown parchment as opposed to the sepia we’ve grown accustomed to. “Eri and Hopper of Team Earshot, we of Team Thorn request your aid in our first Radiant Square Team-Up Mission!”

---

East of town, near the edge of East Radiant Forest, we found ourselves at the foot of Shimmering Mountain. I’m sure our ancestors wanted to call it ‘Radiant Mountain’ or ‘Mount Radiant’, but I think this name is fitting. There’s an uneasy, ominous feeling about this place, like a shimmering dream. Ever since we arrived in Radiant Square, the purple cloud at its peak has been visible in the distance, but it’s even more imposing up close. Has it grown bigger in the past month?

Tall, imposing, scary, horrifying, daunting mountain aside, before us stands a carved-out entrance to a cave, stretching far beyond the reaches of sunlight. Drops of water echo throughout, making my fur stand on end.

“We’re sure this is the place, right? Not a different Shimmering Mountain? This is the one for sure?” Eri’s speaking faster than normal.

That said, I’m guilty of the same thing. “O-Or maybe the client meant somewhere nearby? I-I mean… nobody would want to wander in here, right?”

Samuel pulls the mission listing out of his duffel bag. “You’d think, but you’d be wrong. The client says he and his friend, an Aipom, were playing nearby and got separated. He’s pretty sure he heard him yelling from inside.” He raises a claw to the cave mouth.

“No choice then, we’re going in~!”

Eri frantically flails her arms in front of her. “N-No choice? We can, uh, climb up a bit and find another way in, yeah?” She looks to me for approval.

“Mhm! F-For sure!” I try to scope out the path up. Nothing is jumping out to me, but there’s gotta be some alternate route, right?

Samuel releases a heavy sigh. “We’re adventurers. It’s not our job to find the easy way out. There’s someone in trouble, so we have to step to it.” He crosses his claws and taps his boot as he reprimands us, looking at us over his shoulder.

“U-Understood…” My view drops to the floor. I can’t muster the courage to meet his glare.

“Right… sorry…” Eri recedes into her big scarf.

“He’s right, yes, but he doesn’t need to be so stern about it.” Rosemary turns to us and crouches down to just above our eye level. “Think about it this way. That Aipom must be scared out of his mind, so it’s on us to push through whatever fear we have. Nothing wrong with being nervous your first time, but you gotta move forward.”

Eri and I lock eyes. “Are you ready to move forward?” Her voice is still shaky, but I can tell she’s trying her best for me.

If I have Eri with me, I’ll be fine. We can do this… “Ready if you are. L-Let’s do it together!”

“Before we head in, let’s talk strategy.” Samuel turns our way, the four of us now assembled in a loose huddle. “Once we’re far enough in, the radio signals from our badges won’t reach Radiant Square, so we’ll have to be more careful than usual.” He pulls his badge out of his bag. “Hopper, mind letting me see yours?”

“Sure.” I unclip my shiny new badge and place it in Samuel’s claw.

He hands it off to Rosemary. “Partners have their badges synced already, but you can link up with members of other teams too.” He presses a new button on his badge, and Rosemary does the same with mine. The lights on both badges pulse blue for a moment before displaying a solid green in unison. Eri’s shines green as well. The light isn’t very strong, hardly capable of illuminating anywhere around it, but plainly visible regardless. “We’re all linked up now. If one of us activates the distress signal, everyone’s badges will respond to it. If we’re all in the same cave, the signal should reach.”

“If you press the button quickly, it’ll send out a signal to all the badges and try to touch base at Radiant Square. If you hold it, it’ll only send the signal to your teammates. Even though we won’t be able to reach home on this mission, be mindful of which signal you’re sending out.” Rosemary seems well-versed in this stuff too. I guess they have been adventurers for a few years, must be some overlap in the technology from town to town.

“They can also try to track each other’s location, but it can be unreliable in environments with variable elevation or in areas like caves.” He returns my badge. “Any questions?”

Eri and I are silent.

“Good, you two are quick on the uptake.” He gazes into the cave. “Dark and narrow, and hopefully linear too. Client said that his friend sounded pretty far in, probably on the second level at least. I should take point, and Rosemary can take rear. We’re better on defense than you two.”

I’m guessing ‘point’ is the front of the line? “So Eri and I in the middle? Fine by me.”

“That doesn’t make sense.” Eri raises her paw and chimes in. “We didn’t bring anything to illuminate the cave. If you’re in front, we won’t be able to see anything.” Wait, I don’t like where this is going… “Hopper is the only one who can light the way. He should lead.” We both lean in to look at each other. “Hey, don’t pout at me.”

“You’d be pouting too if you were in my shoes…”

She pats my back with her tail and looks my way with a smile. “I’ll be right next to you, alright?” She points to Rosemary and Samuel. “You two should be able to fit side by side behind us. Rosemary should take the rear if the cave gets too narrow, since Samuel can’t attack from range.”

Leading the way sucks, but I can’t argue with her logic. Samuel is left speechless too, and he seems a little frustrated that his plan got refuted.

“Good thinking!” Rosemary is as enthusiastic as ever, though. “Is everyone ready~?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.” I shake my arm, preparing the electricity within.

“Ready!” Eri stands close on my right side.

“I’m ready too, of course. Samuel~?” She takes position behind Eri.

I hear him step into place behind me. “Ready. Let’s move out.”

---

Despite its threatening aura, there was no resistance to speak of as we ventured through the cave.

“Makes me n-nervous… could be something lurking around any corner…” Our light began to shake a bit as Hopper mused to himself. Guess he also finds the lack of wild Pokémon strange.

“Our target couldn’t have gotten as far as he did if the place was crawling with wild Pokémon.” Samuel, meanwhile, is unbothered. “That said, he didn’t have a light, so he could’ve evaded detection. If there’s anything in our path, we’ll likely have no choice but to engage. Keep your eyes peeled.”

His manner of speech is striking. Hopper and I never communicate nearly so formally. I find it hard to believe that Rosemary does either. Is he just putting on a show?

“Wait a minute, did you three hear that?” We all stop as Rosemary speaks up.

In our silence, only the dripping water can be heard echoing throughout.

“Oh, sorry, must’ve been my imagination~!”

I finally release my breath. “Don’t scare me like that, Rosemary…”

We continue at a steady pace. Our footsteps – particularly Samuel’s, with those big boots of his – overpower the ever-present dripping. If an actual Pokémon were to appear, we should still be able to hear-

Fshshshsh…

Hopper and I both stop dead in our tracks, but Rosemary bumps into my back. “Is something the matter?”

Hopper looks over his shoulder. “D-Did you not hear that? That swishing sound?”

“Nope. Now you’re the one imagining things, Hopper.” Rosemary shrugs unconvincingly.

“If you say so…” He continued forward, though a bit slower now.

Fshshshshsh…

“Eep!” Hopper jumps up, losing control of his light.

“Hey, easy now.” I take his paw. “It’s nothing to worry about, alright? Just try to keep the light steady.”

“Mm…” He reorients his other arm, illuminating the path forward again.

Fshshshshsh…

“Urk…” He grips my paw even tighter.

If there’s something here, it should have revealed itself by now. Something tells me…

Fshsh-

Gotcha!

The instant the sound begins, I look behind me. It was a Pokémon, but it’s not a wild one. Rosemary is having the time of her life rustling her leaf-arms together, but she stops when I spot her. With her arms now folded below her waist and her gaze drifting to the ceiling, she looks about as guilty as can be. Samuel just rolls his eyes, but he’s complacent in this little scheme.

Whatever. As long as she stops. Only I’m allowed to mess with Hopper.

He’s, uh, still holding my paw, actually. Really tight, too.

…not that I mind.

---

“Just our luck…” Samuel’s voice is low, like a frustrated growl.

We come to a stop as my light splits into two just ahead. Unfortunately, the cave path forks.

“Guess we gotta pick a side and see where it leads, right?” Eri speaks up.

Rosemary rests her tilted head atop one of her leaf-hands. “That would be the safe option, but…”

“When you’re on a rescue job, you need to weigh safety with speed.” Samuel sighs, throwing up his claws in a shrug. “We’d best split up. Cover as much ground as we can.”

“Did you forget what I said? Hopper is the only one with a light, we have to stick with him.”

Eri’s remark brings back that frustration Samuel showed earlier. “Hrmm…” Or maybe not frustration, actually. Maybe indecision? “Alright, Rosemary, you’ve had your fun.”

“F-Fun? I, uh, haven’t a clue what you’re talking about…” She holds her leaves behind her, rocking back and forth on her feet.

“Another horrible poker face…”

Rosemary winces at Eri’s remark. “Okay, okay. You win…” She cups her leaves together, and they begin to course with a natural glow. This glow emerges from the tips, coalescing into a levitating light. “It’s a technique called Sunny Day. It takes a bit of energy to use, but it should get the job done.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” I shine my light at her as I ask.

“Well…” She looks around between us. Next to me, Eri is staring daggers at her, though her blush contradicts that intense expression. “Erm, it’s your first big mission, so I wanted you to have the experience of guiding the way… It was just to give you two a precious memory together!” Her gaze drifts between Eri and I as her eyes narrow. “…and I can see that it worked.”

We look between us, where our paws are still interlocked. “A-Ah, er, sorry… I forgot…” I sheepishly pull back my paw. That Rosemary…

“N-No! Don’t apologize…” Eri’s anxious embarrassment quickly shifts to resolve. “E-Enough about that… Rescue mission, guys! We’re on a rescue mission! We gotta get moving!”

Samuel clears his throat, drawing everyone’s attention. “Yes, moving on. Hopper and I will take the left. Eri and Rosemary, you take the right.” Teaming up with just Samuel is a little scary, but it’s a sound strategy. Samuel and Rosemary are far more experienced than Eri and I, so this allows us to split that experience. Besides… “Eri, keep Rosemary in line for me.”

Eri puts her paws at her hips authoritatively. “Understood.”

“So mean, sunshine…” Rosemary slumps over defeatedly.

“We’ll see you boys soon.” Eri points to my badge as she drags a sullen Rosemary into her side of the cave. “Don’t forget our promise, Hopper! If you use it, we’ll come running.”

“R-Right, likewise! I’ll see you soon!” I wave goodbye as they depart, the last of Rosemary’s light eventually fading from our view. Which leaves me with…

“Whenever you’re ready. I’ll watch your back.” Samuel steps aside cordially, offering me the lead.

“Mhm. Let’s mosey.”

He tries and fails to conceal a sigh behind me. Is ‘mosey’ too candid?

---

Rosemary and I were silent for a while. As ditzy as she is, she does a pretty good job reading the room. I hesitate to say I’m mad, I’m just in awe at how ridiculous this girl is.

“Uh, Eri…” In the three weeks we’ve been friends, this meek tone is one I hadn’t even imagined coming from Rosemary.

“Yes?” Intentional or not, my response came out sounding a little agitated.

“I’m sorry about earlier… I meant what I said about making a precious memory, but I think I took it too far…”

Listen, she’s right to apologize, but hearing this bubbly girl talk like this is making me feel bad. “Yeah, you did go too far. Besides wasting time, you scared Hopper. He’s fragile, you know.” Maybe a little hypocritical of me, but I think I know his boundaries with the teasing. I stop and turn around, letting a somewhat exaggerated sigh slip out. “But I know you were well-meaning with it, so I forgive you. You’re a hard sort to stay mad at. And besides…”

“Besides…?”

“…it probably will become a precious memory, so you succeeded on that front.”

“Hehehe~!” …right back to normal.

“You were still in the wrong, don’t forget!”

She’s still giggling as she continues. “I know, I know. Give me a little credi-” Rosemary’s speech drives to a screeching halt as her gaze lifts far above my head. “Look out!”

“Huh?” Before I can react at all, Rosemary embraces me, leaning forward to protect me from all angles.

“Ow! Watch it, you!” She turns around, blocking me off from our opponent as well as she can.

Peeking out from behind her wide, natural dress, I see a large Pokémon with a huge, open mouth. It’s a bit taller than even Rosemary, with a wingspan that’s wider still. One of the most numerous Pokémon out there, and the bane of any spelunker: Golbat.

“Get ready. Attack on my cue.” Rosemary glances back at me as she speaks. This is another unfamiliar tone for her. This usually upbeat girl now sounds cold and calculated. “Until then, stay behind me.”

Leaving Rosemary on defense seems like an odd play; she’s at a disadvantage against this opponent. The size difference between me and the enemy is gigantic, though, so we’re both at equal risk here. I’m a million times more effective on offense here than she is, so the strategy makes sense.

Rosemary takes a low stance, preparing to duck or otherwise cover me. While the opponent prepares to attack, the bud atop Rosemary’s head begins to faintly glow. Okay, I get what my cue is now. The timing window is going to be tight on her end, though.

I’ve never tried to apply Helping Hand in this way, but let’s see how it works… I charge up energy in my paw. I’m rushing it, so it’s not a ton, but it’s enough to give this strategy a test run. “Rosemary, here…” I touch her outstretched leaf, allowing the energy to creep up her body and swell up as an even stronger light at her bud.

Wait for it…

Any second now…

Here it comes!

“Not so fast! Stun Spore!” Rosemary’s called attack erupts in an explosion of yellow spores from above. The Golbat swoops past us just in time to inhale a whole bunch, and it falls to the ground behind us. “Eri, your turn!”

“On it!” I pivot on my hindlegs and launch off. I leap into the air and wind up a forepaw during my descent. “You’re mine!”

SCREEEEE!

While my momentum did most of the work, and it wasn’t a particularly strong hit, every little bit counts. I return to Rosemary’s side.

“Nice form, but might I suggest…”

---

“Hopper, are you feeling light-footed today?”

“What kind of a question is that?”

“Hopefully that means yes. You’ve got thirty seconds, don’t get careless.”

“Thirty seconds until what?!”

…

“S-Samuel?” Where Samuel stood just a moment before now laid a hole in the ground.

Grrrrrrrrrr…

With Samuel gone, I’m trapped in this narrow corridor with two wild Pokémon. They’re both of the same species; quadrupeds of a little over double my standing height. Armor-like steel plating covers their rocky bodies at the head and on the spine, sticking out as horns – or maybe more like fins? – along the back. Their striking blue eyes clash with an otherwise monochrome look, filling two of the many dark holes in their plating. Their mouths are huge, still a little hung open as they growl at me.

Alright, eyes off the mouth. Don’t even want to think of that jaw biting down on me.

What’s this thing called again… Aron? That’s the small one, I think. This is their middle form. Thank goodness I don’t have to fight the big bipedal one. That would be a problem.

Thirty seconds. Thirty seconds with these guys. After thinking things though, that number is probably down to twenty-six or twenty-five. What happens in thirty se-

GrrrrrrrrRRRRRAAAAARRRRRR!

Crap, ok, no more thinking! Time to go!

One of them begins charging at me while the other stays behind. It’s loud and scary, but still slow. If I keep my eyes peeled, I can…

“Hup!” …jump past them!

What’re we at now, twenty-one?

Gruh huh huh huh…

Groh hoh hoh hoh…

“You’re awful smug for a guy who just got… tricked…” While looking back at the one I vaulted over, I failed to notice the positioning of their friend. I’m surrounded. “O-Out of the frying pan, into the fire.”

Their grins only grow, glaring at me with heightened intensity. The pit in my stomach gets wider as they rhythmically paw the ground.

“Not fans of cooking jokes, huh…”

GRAAAAAAAAAH!

GROOOOOOOOH!

“E-Easy now!”

---

“Get ‘em!”

“Right!”

Rosemary throws me ahead, thankfully not at an angle that’ll send me flying at the ceiling. This Golbat may have gotten back to its feet, but it hasn’t taken flight yet.

With that momentum, I can make this one count…

“This’ll end it!”

PLOOF!

I slam my tail down on my opponent with all my might.

SCREEEEEE…

It falls forward as I land atop it. Its wing twitches around, but it’s down for the count.

“That… worked better than I expected.” Didn’t realize my tail was this strong. Gotta reign in my strength from now on when I tap Hopper with it.

“You were great, Eri!” Rosemary grabs my paws and jumps up and down, taking me with her.

“The tail was a good call. I hadn’t even thought about it.”

She leans to the side to get a look at it. “You hadn’t? You’ve just been slapping enemies with your paws this whole time?”

“More or less. I focus on support in most fights. I’m not too used to fighting yet myself.”

Rosemary raises one of her leaves and leans in, like a teacher talking to a student. “Fighting is all about adaptation. We have commonly recognized ‘moves’ like Pound, but sticking to those moves too closely won’t get you far. Most Pokémon will want to hit something with their arms or legs, but if you’ve got a strong tail then you might as well use it! Gotta turn those moves into techniques.”

It’s obvious in hindsight. Everyone in the family cleans with their tails, it’s way more efficient than cleaning with our stubby paws. Why wouldn’t that apply to a fight? “Thanks, Rosemary…”

“Anything for my favorite little rookie~!”

Little? How rude! “Fellow rookie. We’re the same rank.”

“Oh, hush. You’re a rookie in my eye-”

THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP-

---

The two behemoths barreled towards me at their top speed.

Must be, what, four seconds to impact?

Samuel needs another fifteen seconds for whatever he’s doing. Why even give me a time limit? Whatever you’re doing, just do it now! He’s digging, right? He doesn’t need to dig around for that long!

Or maybe the time limit is for me? But for what?

He told me to stay nimble, so he must not want me to fight them.

Two seconds to impact.

Oh, that’s it, he wants me to keep them steady! If they’re on the move, he could miss!

Can’t dodge low. Samuel will probably come from there.

One second to impact.

Alright, let’s hope this works!

“Hup!”

I push off the ground with all the strength my legs have.

CLANG!

“Aha!”

I land atop their heads, one foot on each.

“W-Woah!” The one to my left shakes its head, shrugging off any recoil from that headbutt. The sudden movement makes me lose my balance, and I’m stuck hanging on to the other one’s horn.

Grooooooooooh…

Now that it’s back in action, it stares at me intently from atop its friend’s head.

Groh hoh hoh hoh!

Gruh huh huh huh!

“Hey, uh, let’s sort this out, alright?”

GrrrrrrrrrUH!

It launches me off its head and into the air. The height of my ascent is just barely below the ceiling, but the real threat is below…

Grhrhrhrhr!

The other one positions its horn-fin-thing right below me. If I land on that thing at this speed and angle, I’ll get winded… and if I can’t move, I’m toast!

“Now, Samuel, do it now! Now now now now NOW! DOUBLE TIME!”

vrrrrrrrrrrrrr-

Gruh huh?

VROOSH!

“Don’t rush me, pipsqueak!”

GROGH!

Samuel leaps out from below, toppling our opponent on his side.

“Hopper, get ready!”

Ready for what?”

He stands below me with his claw outstretched. He tries his best to orient it near my legs, which means I’d better land on my feet!

With a little reorientation of my own, I’m able to land smoothly atop his claw. He even does the courtesy of accounting for my momentum on the way down.

“Nice landing. Get ready to fly.”

“F-Fly?”

“Go take care of it!”

FWOOSH!

With a hearty swing I’m sent on a head-to-head collision course with the remaining enemy. After what just transpired, it’s totally awestruck, which means it’s vulnerable!

“Incoming!”

A clean landing on one foot!

“Samuel, get ready to catch!”

“On it!”

I kick off my opponent, launching towards the ceiling.

“Grab hold!”

As he says, I grab on to his claw and swing around, conserving my momentum to launch back at the enemy. Samuel’s got strong legs to be able to jump like this.

“Not done yet!” I hold my paws together and spark a little electricity, slamming them down on its steel forehead. “Rest is up to you!”

“Playtime’s over!” Samuel slides in below me, chopping at the Pokémon’s chin with the side of his claw.

Gr… Grugh…

THUD!

…and it’s down for the count.

“Huff… huff… huff…”

“Are you… huff… good…?” Samuel asks from behind me, hardly able to speak for himself.

“They… huff… were tough…” I lift my arms into the air, stretching wide. “You… saved me big time there. Thanks…”

He steps past me and raises a claw to his side. “You caught on well, and you made a good callout. You saved yourself, I just helped.”

“I… appreciate that.” Sure doesn’t feel like I saved myself, especially with how pissed off he got when he- wait a second! “Hey! You called me ‘pipsqueak’! Take it back!”

“Hmm…” He turns back to me, looking me up and down. “Why? It’s not inaccurate. Good work out there, pipsqueak. Bring that energy into the next fight.”

“Hmph! Fine, be like that!”

“Quit moping. We’ve got a kid to save. Less moseying, more moving.”

I’m embarrassed to admit it, but all the excitement nearly made me forget. “R-Right! Eri and Rosemary are waiting for us too, so let’s move out!”

---

“Ah!” The ground shakes all around, throwing me off balance before Rosemary catches me.

She sighs and crosses her leaves. “That’s probably the boys…”

“Y-You think?” If that’s something attacking Hopper, then… “Come on, we gotta hurry! They must be in trouble!” There’s no time to waste! I need to help!

“Woah, Eri, deep breaths. Don’t forget about the mission, we need to keep moving forward.”

“No deep breaths! Hopper’s in danger, I need to save him!”

She steps in front of me and crouches down, taking hold of my badge. “They haven’t sounded the distress signal, though.”

“No, Rosemary, you don’t know him. He’s probably just being stubborn, or maybe some Pokémon took it! Or broke it!” If something broke his badge, I don’t want to so much as think about what it could be doing to him right now.

“And what about Samuel, then?”

“What about him?”

“He could activate the signal too, you know.” Rosemary stands up and moves behind me, placing her leaves on my shoulders. “I get it, but have a little faith in them. Samuel’s one tough cookie, and Hopper seems like one too. A tough little misty-eyed cookie.” She pushes me forward a bit, and we finally start moving.

“Hrmmm…” She has a point, but I can’t shake the feeling. Just thinking about what could be happening is freaking me out. “So, you’re not worried about Samuel at all?”

“I never said that. That boy’s a big dummy. You should’ve seen him when we were kids.”

“What was he like?”

She’s quiet for a second. “Stupid.” She releases my shoulders and walks at my side. “Always getting into fights, and then getting in trouble. I didn’t know him that well at the time, but I sure as hell knew about him.”

Sounds familiar. “Small town?”

“Sorta. Small or not, word traveled fast, and folks started talking.” She goes quiet again, like she’s lost in a sea of memories. “Whoops, I’m rambling. The point is that yes, I’m worried about him, but I also trust him. And for what it’s worth, I trust Hopper too.”

“Yeah, but…”

“And they’re trusting us. All four of us have a job to do, so we’ve gotta believe they can do theirs.” She takes hold of my paw. “If – Arceus forbid – I’m wrong, I’ll buy you dinner for the rest of the month. And I’ll do every second of grunt work to make that thing for Hopper, too.”

“You can’t be serious.”

“Serious as can be, sister! And believe you me, these coffers can’t handle buying that much food, so that’s some confidence you can believe in.”

Frankly, my mind is still racing with the worst-case scenario. Rosemary has just as many reasons – maybe even more – to be worried, though, so I have to try and believe in the girl that believes in both of our partners. “Alright, alright. If you’re that confident in them, I’ll try too.”

---

“You see those, Hopper?”

“Mm.” As we rounded a sharp bend, my light shone upon a corridor bearing wooden support beams; the first corridor of its sort thus far. “What do you think they’re for?”

He stepped behind me as the cave narrowed somewhat. “This passage is cut out more… what’s the word… uniform. A formation like this doesn’t occur naturally. Support beams must’ve gone up when they dug through.”

“We’re walking through a mine, then?”

“Not a particularly well-maintained one. Nor a very well-planned one. Should’ve put up support beams throughout the place, not just in the spots that were carved by Pokémon.”

“At least we know this section won’t cave in on us.”

With that small reassurance, we pressed forward. There wasn’t exactly a staircase to the second level, but we’d been gradually elevating throughout. Must be a floor up by now.

“Did the client give us any estimate of where his friend might be?”

“Nothing. Just gotta keep moving.”

“Wait… is that them?” A familiar voice echoes in the distance.

“I think it is!” And another responds. “Samuel~! Hopper~! We’re over here!”

“Quiet down… it’ll hear you…!” A quieter, unknown voice.

“Let’s hurry.” Samuel nods at me.

“On it.”

---

“It? What’s it?”

“I-I’ll explain later, okay? We should get out of here pronto…” The Aipom speaks at nearly a whisper, though his voice is uneasy and frantic.

“Just sit tight. Our partners should be here soon.” Rosemary rubs his shoulder in an attempt to ease his worries.

…but he’s still shaking all the while. “I hope they’re not far behind…”

Not even a minute later, the footsteps grow louder and louder.

“H-Hopper, is that you?”

One of those sets of footsteps gets faster. “Yes! It’s me!” From a shaft up above, Hopper emerges. “Up here, Eri!” He waves his paws around in excitement.

---

This cave formation is something to behold. Bright stones are scattered throughout the walls and illuminate the area. About time, I was getting tired of being a lantern. It’s a multi-layered vertical shaft, with entrances and platforms extending far upwards. Eri, Rosemary, and the Aipom are on the ground floor, with Samuel and I on the second level. Well, calling it a ‘level’ might be inaccurate. It’s really just a rocky platform carved out of the wall. Some of the levels above have carved out, stone bridges that extend all the way across, and others have bridges made of wood and reinforced with steel.

“Can you jump down from there?” Eri sounds nervous to ask.

“Uh…” It’s pretty steep. “I dunno, let me- woah!”

Before I can make up my mind, I’m scooped up in Samuel’s claws, who jumps down without a second thought.

“Warn me next time, you…”

“I’ll think about it.”

Eri runs to my side as I’m set down. “You’re… okay, right?”

“Huh? Yeah, not a scratch on me. None that weren’t already there, at least.”

She breathes a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness. I heard all that commotion… you had me worried!”

“Just a couple of wild…” Oh, right, that’s the name! “…Lairon, that’s all. Nothing I couldn’t handle!”

“First of all, don’t take all the credit.” Samuel interjects from behind me. “Second, cut the small talk. We’ve gotta be going.” He hoists his bag as he finishes.

“Oh, right, sorry.” Eri turns to the Aipom. “Stay in the middle, we’ll guide you out.”

He picks himself up and nods. “Got it. I’m way past ready to ge-”

Rumble… Rumble…

Everyone is frozen in place.

Rumble… Rumble…

“What… is that…?” Eri steps a little closer to me as she dares to ask.

---

RUMBLE… RUMBLE…

“Everybody, let’s move, now!” Samuel’s tone is even more fierce than usual. He grabs the Aipom and begins running to the tunnel.

CRASH!

The rock wall on the other end of the cave collapses in an instant.

A hulking silhouette is visible through the dust and debris.

THOOM.

THOOM.

THOOM.

THOOM.

It marches ever closer.

That… must be ‘it’…

Two silver horns.

Piercing blue eyes.

A colossal frame of rock and steel.

GROOOOOOOOOOOORH!

Great. An Aggron. That’s wonderful.

“G-Guess I jinxed it.” The moment the Aggron busted in, Hopper snapped into an agile battle stance. How is he so brave against such a strong Pokémon?

GRRRRRRRRR…

“Snap out of it Hopper, we’re retreating!” The usual ditziness is once again absent from Rosemary’s voice. “Step to it, while we all still-”

…RAAAAGH!

CRUNK!

Our steel-coated friend slams its enormous foot down, sending a shockwave across the room which challenges the cave’s structure.

CRASH!

A chunk of rock dislodges from the corridor we took, caving the entrance in.

---

“Looks like we’re not running.” Eri talks as if she’s completely unfazed, but how? This is such a mess. What’re we going to do? How is she keeping her cool?

Wait, no. She’s shaking. I can see it in her paw, and her ear is twitching too.

Even though she’s scared…

---

Rosemary lets out a heavy sigh of relief. “Samuel pinged my badge, so the rocks didn’t crush him. Hopefully that Aipom is alright as well.”

“B-But what about us?” Hopper hardly glances over his shoulder at us as he maintains his stance. On further inspection, he’s totally shaken up. Guess that makes two of us. Gotta fake it ’til you make it, especially when you’ve got a partner relying on you. He must understand that too.

“We’ll just have to manage for a little while.”

---

‘Just manage’? We’re totally blocked in, and we’re supposed to ‘just manage’? “How can you-”

“Because I trust him.” There’s a deep conviction in Rosemary’s voice. “I got a good look at what Eri can do, so you’ve got a lot to live up to, Hopper. Better not disappoint me, or we’ll be a pair of red stains and a bundle of leaves before long~!” But that ditziness comes right back.

Red stains…

This Aggron is big, that’s for sure.

Much bigger than they usually come. Even Rosemary is less than half its height.

It could probably do it.

Red stains.

No! No red stains! Don’t even picture it, Hopper! All three of us are walking out of here!

“Y-Yes ma’am! I’ll do my best!”

“Good boy. Now then, Miss Leader, what’s our first move~?”

---

Leader? Me?

Whatever. I don’t have the luxury of sweating the details right now.

It’s big, so we need to stay evasive, but it’s limited against quick opponents like Hopper and myself. Not a ton I can do against a Pokémon with that much armor, but Hopper could pierce through it. Rosemary can get a bit done too. Unless we gain the upper hand, I should focus on support.

Hopper needs to get in close to do much. His Thunder Shocks can do a little, but I need him to go all out. Well, as close to all out as he can get without hurting himself. Rosemary should keep her distance. Between all four of us, she’s the only one who can reliably attack from afar. If Hopper and I can keep it occupied, then Rosemary will have time to build up her strength. Grass-types are usually good at that kind of thing.

Alright. I’ve got the general idea.

“I’ll support Hopper. You hang back and get yourself ready. On my cue, I want you to hit it with everything you’ve got and then some. You’re our ace, so we’ll be counting on you.”

“And what then?”

What then?

GRRRRRRRRRR…

“We’ll improvise, Rosemary. Tall, metal, and gruesome is getting impatient.” I step next to Hopper. “Ready?”

“Hardly, but there’s not much choice.”

“Correct. Let’s go!”

---

Eri and I both dash across the cave at our target, who can only slowly march our way.

“Hit him with all you’ve got, but don’t hurt yourself. When you need a boost, call me over!”

“Understood!”

“And keep his attention, alright?”

“R-Right!” Better I become a red stain than Eri.

Our paths diverge when we get close to the Aggron. The pincer maneuver is our go-to with large opponents like these, but there’s even more on the line this time. I can’t trip up like I did against Ariados. Messing up is not an option today!

Gotta pull its attention first. I spark electricity across my arms, shining them as brightly as I can.

GRORH?!

It looks down at me and begins to turn my way.

“Try and keep up, buckethead!”

GRAAAAAAAAOOOOOOR!

Ok, that’s more than enough!

Gotta get behind him no matter what. Those cave-ins were so precise, so the entire cave is within his effective range…

…but it doesn’t matter how precise you are if you have no idea where your target is!

I pivot on my left foot and jump towards the back of his hindlegs.

Reach out…

Grabbed hold! Climb like your life depends on it, because it just might!

GRUH?

Up, up, up. Hitting most of this plating won’t do me any good, but nothing likes to get hit on the head!

I clasp my paws together and slam down on the steel cranium beneath me.

GROOOOOOOAR!

It’s not exactly a roar of pain, but rather one of agitation. Pain, agitation, mild inconvenience, whatever; I’ll take what I can get here.

I leap off its head and circle back around to Eri, who has taken position to the Aggron’s left.

“How’d I look?”

“Fabulous. Now eyes on the prize, I’m gonna give you a little boost.” Eri places both paws on my shoulders, transferring strong energy from both. “That won’t last forever, so best get moving!”

“On it!”

I feel lighter than before. Helping Hand doesn’t just make me hit harder, it’s a wholistic power boost!

THOOM!

THOOM!

THOOM!

THOOM!

Aggron and I both run at each other head-first. Each of its steps shakes the entire room. We need to wrap up quick, or else it might cause an even worse cave-in.

THOOM!

THOOM!

THOOM!

THOOM!

Big, heavy footsteps. That’s how I turn this around. When I would train with Grandpa, I learned a technique that’s perfect for big opponents. If you can disrupt their footing, their whole advantage goes kaput. This one’s real heavy, so it’s my best shot!

While one leg is up, I’ll slide into the other.

THOOM!

Just a couple paces left.

THOOM!

Red stain.

THOOM!

If I mess up my timing, I’m a red stain.

THOOM!

Guess it’s all or nothing, then! Can’t let Eri see that gruesome scene, so I’ve gotta do it!

THOOM!

Now!

Normally this technique is a sweep with my leg, but the size of my opponent means I’ve gotta put my whole body into it!

---

Hopper kicks off the ground and launches at the Aggron’s left ankle while its right leg is off the ground.

It’s an incredible risk, but that’s my partner. Big idiot.

CRASH!

“Down! Eri, let’s go!”

…a big idiot who can follow through.

“Right, coming!” He circles around the opponent, and I move in to meet him. “Alright, Hopper, take my paw!” There’s something I’ve been wanting to try…

“R-Right!”

We grab each other’s right paws tight.

First things first, give him a Helping Hand…

Then spin him around. He’s significantly shorter and lighter than me, so I can fling him around without too much effort. Years of paw wrestling with my brothers is paying off.

“W-Woah! What’re you-”

Around and around and around…

“Woaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!”

“Get ready… to fly…!”

Momentum is right. Wait for the right angle…

…and release!

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!”

“It’s the Earshot Turnabout! Go get ‘em!”

---

So fast…! And I feel so strong, too!

Focus! Gotta make it count, while it’s still down!

“Here goes!”

BZZZZZZT!

GROOOOOOOOARRRRR!

Ok, that one was a cry of pain for sure!

---

“Leave some for me!”

It’s not much, but I gotta do my part. Can’t leave it all on him.

PLOOF! PLOOF! PLOOF! PLOOF! PLOOF!

G-GROOOAR!

Rosemary was right about using the tail.

“Hopper, on three!”

“Right!”

---

I repositioned behind it, while it sounds like Eri is wailing on its head.

“One…”

I get into position.

“Two…”

I wind up my arm…

“Three!”

THUNK!

A clean hit!

---

PLOOF!

A clean hit!

GROOOOOOAR!

THOOM! A gigantic claw grips the ground.

It’s getting back up now. “Hopper, pull back!”

“On it!” He jumps over the enemy and takes his place next to me, and we make some distance while Aggron stumbles to his feet. “Thought that would’ve done it…”

“When at first you don’t succeed, try and try again. Still got some fight in you?”

“Plenty.” He rolls his shoulder and sparks a little electricity.

GRUH… HUH… HUH…

“Good, good. Just like before, okay?”

GROOOOOOOOOH!

It hunches forward and flexes its arms. Showing off?

Chk, chk, chk, chk…

The steel and rock plating across its body loosens, the gaps between each segment widening. Some sort of steam releases from within, like it’s decompressing.

CLUNK! CLUNK! CLUNK! CLUNK! CLUNK!

Steel plates from its back, and the bangles around its wrists and ankles, crash to the ground.

Shit, I think this is really bad.

---

Eri suddenly grips my paws and leans in. “Ok, change of plans, we’re not doing it like before.”

“W-What? Why? Did I do it wrong?”

“You were fine, it’s the Aggron that’s the problem here.” She points to his plating. “It shed its armor to match our speed. We need to stick to evasion.”

“But how are we gonna win, then?”

She nods towards Rosemary, who is setting up tons of Sunny Day sprites. “Gotta trust our friends. Samuel should be back soon, too.”

Trust seems to be the evergreen answer today. “Alright. Got it. Purely evasive.”

GROOOOOGH!

“Ok, no more time to chat. If you’re in a bind, call for Rosemary!” Eri zips off before she even finishes. “Alright, you big brute, bring it!”

GRAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Our enemy charges towards Eri. The ground is shaking less with each step, but he’s become way faster than before.

Holy crap, it’s actually faster than Eri!

---

Oh shit. Oh shit. How is it this fast?

Too early to call on Rosemary. I gotta keep going.

What was I thinking wearing this big coat?

Arceus, why did you make me so fashionable?!

---

Need to buy as much time for Rosemary as I can, so I can’t just stand around.

It’s moving roughly my top speed, but I wouldn’t be able to outrun him for long. Need to balance its aggression between us!

Wait. Aggression. Aggron…

Heheh. That’s a clever name.

Ok, pull it together, gotta help Eri!

---

“Hey, blockhead!”

GRUH?

Smart move, Hopper, trying to switch its focus back and forth.

The beast slides at me as it pivots to change targets, launching chunks of rock my way without even realizing.

CRUNK! CRUNK! CRUNK!

They all fall to the ground around me as I dodge and weave past them.

Red stain…

La la la! Not thinking about it! We’ve made it this far, so no red stains!

---

It’s coming my way!

Alright Hopper, think it through.

If you pivot now, you won’t be able to hit top speed soon enough to get away. That means red stain.

It’s probably expecting another sweep by now, so he’ll be ready to step on you if you try. That means red stain.

Too wide to go around him.

Obviously can’t go over.

Which means we’re going under! Nobody would ever expect that!

“Out of the way, big guy!”

It’s so big that I don’t even have to crouch or slide or anything to clear him. Just keep running!

GRUH HUH HUH HUH!

“Hopper, look out!”

What? Why’s he laughi-

---

“Out of the way, big guy!”

Hopper sprints between his legs to escape. Not an ideal route, but not a bad call given the situation.

GRUH HUH HUH HUH!

Wait. No no no no no.

“Hopper, look out!”

Gone.

Hopper disappears instantaneously, the enormous tail of an Aggron in his place.

“Hopper?”

Silence.

“H-Hopper…?”

Nothing.

Come on.

Give me something, dummy!

“HOPPER!”

Still nothing.

I’m not giving up on you, you idiot! You’re getting up! No red stains, no red stains, NO red stains!

“GET UP, YOU BIG IDIOT!”

My legs move on their own, propelling me behind the Aggron.

GROH HOH HOH HOH HOOOOOH!

Shut up. Quit laughing.

He’s still under there. You’re hurting him.

“MOVE, DAMN IT!”

---

It’s a familiar feeling.

I’ve been smushed down like this by Bryon before.

This guy is a lot heavier, though.

Man, this hurts.

I wish I could say that I don’t feel anything, but I feel all of it.

Just can’t move a muscle.

---

PLOOF! PLOOF! PLOOF!

Get! Up!

PLOOF! PLOOF! PLOOF!

Move! Your! Damn! Tail!

Arceus Almighty, to hell with this shit! Time to push!

Please, even if it’s the last thing I do, just give me the strength to push this stupid tail.

GROH?

Why… Why can’t I do anything…? Because of me, Hopper’s gonna-

“Urk!”

Its tail swings around, wrapping me up.

Of course, Hopper is still buried beneath another segment of it.

My paw is free. I can use Swift.

Aim for the eyes…

GROOOOOAR!

Getting tighter… I have to…

“R-Rosemary! Now…!”

“Understood!”

All the light she’d been building up coalesces into one vibrant source. You could light up all of Radiant Square with it no problem. Must be, like, twelve Sunny Day sprites. Rosemary absorbs this mass in its entirety. Her beautiful green leaves become indiscernible amidst the light. Only a vague silhouette is visible.

“Fun’s over, big guy~!”

She angles the bulb on her head towards the Aggron.

G-GROH?

Too late for regrets. Should’ve thought about it before you sat on my partner.

“Fire~!”

VWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

A blinding beam of light fires directly at its head. It reaches its claws up to block it, but the force is far too strong. Still, its stance remains resolute, leaving Hopper and I under its control.

---

Eri’s yelling something.

I can’t make it out, but she sounds really upset.

Knowing her, she’s gonna do something reckless to get me out of here.

That won’t do.

Alright, that’s enough rest.

We’re in this together, so I’ve gotta pull my weight too.

Arms and legs are out. Even if I could move them, this tail is just too heavy.

What else, then…

If I tried to speak, the sound wouldn’t make it out.

Can’t reach my badge, not that it would do much for me right now.

VWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

Even from my stony prison, I can hear it loud and clear.

I’m guessing that’s whatever Rosemary was charging up.

Charging up…

Holy crap. I’m a freaking genius!

Doesn’t matter if my arms and legs are shot.

I’m an Electric Pokémon, baby!

Who knows if it’ll work, but I gotta give it a try.

It’s like Grandpa always told me…

Bugs like us don’t take shit lying down…

We hop back up!

---

Gotta pitch in. Even if it’s nothing compared to Rosemary, I’ve gotta do something.

Swift! Swift! Swift!

Keep firing it off until my arm breaks!

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR…

If we had just a little more power, then it woul-

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Hopper?!

Another blinding light, this time below the tail. It erupts from underneath, conducting across the cracks in the beast’s plating.

G-GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

It lost its footing! I’m free!

vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…

Something below the surface, growing closer…

Directly beneath the Aggron.

“Eri! Grab Hopper!” Rosemary screams from across the room, on her knees from the sheer power of her own attack.

Right, I need to get him up while I still can!

“E… ri…”

“Shhhhhhh. Tell me how cool I am later, okay?”

“…kay.”

He shuts his eyes.

Thank Arceus I’m strong enough to lift him.

I really thought he was dead for a second.

vrrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRR…

The noise is even louder now, right under its belly.

Whatever it is, I better stand clear!

VROOSH!

The ground explodes beneath it, revealing a shining white claw.

Took him long enough.

“Say goodbye!”

CRACK!

A claw plows straight into its jaw, and I can hear the steel crack a little on impact.

GR… OOOOOUGH…

And with a mighty ‘THOOOOOOOM’, it went down.

---

Up and down. Up and down. It’s a rhythmic motion. A relaxing rhythm.

Where am I? Wasn’t I pinned under an Aggron?

Oh, that’s right, Eri saved me.

“Oh~? Looks like someone’s finally up.”

“Rose… mary…?”

“Good news, Eri. His brain still works.”

The bobbing platform I’m on jolts to the side. “Samuel! Don’t tease her like that!”

“Nngh…” I reach up and rub my eyes. The first thing I see is a giant pale face. Those beady orange eyes lock with mine, curling into a mouthless smile.

“Glad to have you back~!”

“R-Right…” I look around and get a feel for my environment. We’re in the forest, and it’s starting to get dark. All that, and… “Um, Rosemary, how long have you been carrying me?”

She tilts her head and looks to the sky. “Since we left the cave. Guess you missed the ending. Eri helped you out from under that Aggron, and Samuel jumped in to finish it off.”

“You were out cold by the time it was all over. I had to carry some bags, and Eri’s too small, so we elected Rosemary to carry you out.” Samuel pauses for a second. “Oh, you should probably put him down now that he can move.”

“Hmm~” Rosemary looks down at me. “What say you, Hopper?”

Well, I can move, but…

“I wouldn’t mind resting my legs a little longer…”

“Figured as much. Suppose you’ve earned it. You did well! You too, Eri~!”

“H-Huh?” Eri seems to have been behind them until now and ran up to Rosemary when she called her name. “You’re going crazy, Rosemary. I barely did anything. You and Hopper did all the hard work, and Samuel got that awesome finisher. I was just a distraction…” I’ve never heard Eri this dejected before, not even when we failed the exam.

“No, no, I’m serious!” Rosemary turns to her. “I couldn’t have charged up without you, and then we’d all have been screwed!”

“I guess… But most of that was Hopper…”

It’s silent for a moment.

“Let’s hear it then, Hopper.” Samuel speaks up beside me. “Sounding like you did all the work. What’s your angle?”

I look over to her. In Rosemary’s arms, my eyeline is a bit above Eri’s for once.

“You’re full of shit, Eri.”

---

“W-WHAT?!” I’m astounded. Hopper’s never spoken to me like that. Samuel almost bursts out laughing.

Hopper nods. “You heard me. Without you, the three of us would all be dead.”

They all keep trying to hype me up, but I see through the stupid pity party. “Yeah, maybe as a distrac-”

“Not just a distraction.” Surprisingly, Hopper cuts me off. This is the most serious I’ve seen him. “Without you telling me what to do, I wouldn’t have lasted a single minute in there.”

“He’s right.” Rosemary chimes in from above. “You had perfect timing telling me when to use Solar Beam, too. Any sooner or later could’ve gotten one of us killed.” Rosemary…

Samuel clears his throat. “I wasn’t there, so I didn’t see it all go down, but it sounds like our partners are ready to call you today’s MVP.” He looks between all of us. “All in favor?”

“Me!”

“And me too~!”

“That’s unanimous. Congratulations, Eri.” Samuel rubs my head with his claw.

This gang of idiots knows exactly how to cheer a girl up. “You guys…”

I felt a lot better the rest of the way back.

“You four are heroes! Thank you all so much!” We met back up with the Aipom at town hall, who thanked us profusely while balancing atop his tail.

“Mind if I ask you something?” I feel a little bad talking shop with this kid while he’s still shaken up, but I’ve gotta know. “You alluded to some ‘it’ while we were in there. Was ‘it’ the Aggron?”

The Aipom looks confused. “Aggron? No, it was something else. Big and long, it was slithering nearby when I was hiding.”

Slithering? Some kind of serpentine Pokémon? “Well, guess we don’t have to worry about it now. You stay away from the cave, alright?”

“Y-Yes ma’am! I’ve had enough caves for one lifetime!”

“Good, good. You should be getting back to your family now. We’ll see you around.”

“Right! Thanks again, Teams Thorn and Earshot!”

He hopped out of the room, waving with both hands all the way.

Lisa leaned in over her desk. “Big day, huh?”

“Too big…” Hopper’s back on his feet now, but he slumps over in a nearby chair the second our client leaves.

“On the bright side, big day means big pay! The parents chipped in some extra for your trouble, and the Guild decided to waive the rescue fee. Called it their thanks for discovery.” She digs through some drawers, taking out two fat bags of cash. “After tax, it comes out to 1,600 Poké per team!”

Oh, right. We’re D-Rank now. Taxes. Great. Can hardly complain though. 1,600 is a damn fine payout.

“’Thanks for discovery?’” Samuel steps up to the counter. “What, nobody knew about the giant Aggron in the cave?”

“Long since abandoned I hear. Must’ve moved in there in the past couple years. Guild said they’d look into a more thorough investigation of the place sometime soon, but who knows when that’ll be.” Lisa throws her arms up. “Guess that’s a conversation for later, though. You four go home and celebrate. You’ve earned it!”

“Yes ma’am!”

The sun was down and the moon was up by the time we finished at town hall. “The two of us should be going. Thanks for everything toda-”

“Woah, woah, woah.” Samuel interrupts me, holding his claws out. “You two are seriously gonna walk home?”

“Not much choice.”

Rosemary crosses her leaves into an X. “Wrong answer~! As your seniors – and your BFFs – we refuse to let you walk home tonight. Isn’t that right, Samuel?”

“…Right.” He doesn’t seem super pleased with the outcome, nor being called a ‘BFF’, but I can tell he’s warming up bit by bit. “Our door’s open if you two want to spend the night. We’ll make dinner and everything.”

“Really? You guys really don’t need to.” Mom taught me to be all polite with stuff like this, but I don’t mind taking this offer one bit. Rosemary isn’t the type to back down on this stuff either.

“Consider it a show of gratitude for our MVP. And her adorable partner, of course.” Rosemary does a little curtsy, while Samuel crosses his claws and nods approvingly. “What’re you two in the mood for? We could throw together some pasta, or maybe some-”

“U-Um!” Hopper suddenly draws everyone’s attention. “I, uh- I can cook, if you want… Pasta, or maybe soup, or grilled cheese? I can do it if you want.”

Everyone’s silent for a second. I didn’t think he knew how to cook; his diet since I’ve met him has consisted of apples and berries.

“Pasta’s fine with me.” Samuel smiles a little.

“Sounds nice! Thanks, Hopper~!”

He looks at me nervously.

“Well, now I gotta know if your cooking’s any good. Let’s do it!”

---

When it was just me and Grandpa I didn’t have to make terribly large servings, but this is a waaaaaay bigger serving size than back then. Eri and I alone are already pretty close to the Hopper and Grandpa serving, but Rosemary and Samuel more than double it.

Thankfully, they had everything I need at the house. Grandpa always loved pasta with spinach and mushrooms. I thought it was icky as a kid, but it’s an acquired taste. I’ve been craving it for months.

Rosemary didn’t seem into it, though, so I’m gonna heat up some Tamato sauce she has lying around as well. Samuel accepted the nutritional benefits of the meal, while Eri emphasized that she’s putting a lot of trust in me as a chef. ‘Both spinach and mushrooms are outside of my comfort zone, so you better make it real good!’ she said.

It’s a little nerve-wracking. Hopefully I’m not too out of practice…

Sorry, how does Rosemary even eat?

Amidst my stress in the kitchen, a lively conversation has sprung up in the living room. I can hear it clearly, as there’s no obstruction between the two rooms, I’d just been so absorbed in cooking that I hadn’t been listening.

---

“He’s seriously never cooked for you before?” Rosemary leans on the table like it’s the juiciest gossip she’s ever heard.

“Not once. Our commute is too long for us to bother grocery shopping, so we just get by on fruit we find nearby.” It’s a lifestyle that I’d like to change very very soon, as the limited diet has started to get to me. Now that I know he can cook, maybe I should start putting him to work. Unless he’s bad at it, in which case I can just stick to the fruits for now…

N-Not that I think he’s a bad cook, though! ‘Trust your partner’ and all that good stuff!

“So what gives, Hopper? It’s not good to conceal your skills from your partner.” Samuel raises his voice so Hopper can hear the taunt.

I hear him begin to stir faster. “It never came up, okay? Like she said, we don’t have much food at home.”

“How’d you learn, then? You’ve lived there your whole life, right?” Samuel’s rudeness gave way to an actual conversation after all.

“Grandpa would run to the store sometimes. He almost never took me along, but he’d come back with a whole bunch of stuff each time. He always struggled to cook with those big axe-arms, so he got me started when I was little.”

Oh yeah, he mentioned that he did a bunch of chores. Hadn’t considered that cooking was a part of that.

“Congrats, Eri. You landed on a house husband.” Samuel scoffs. “Rosemary wishes she had that luxury.”

“Would be nice if you picked up cooking too, sunshine…”

“Quiet, you. He’s not my anything husband right now. We’re not even dating.”

“‘Right now’, huh? Never say never~!”

“Hopper’s gone strangely quiet too…” Leave it to Rosemary to get resident stoic-badass-wannabe Samuel in on the romance talk.

---

I-Is that what ‘date’ means…?

---

“Oh, oh! You know…” Oh, brother. What’s she got now. “…if you have time, you should make Hopper an apron! Wouldn’t it be cute?”

Regardless of her intentions with the question, I can’t deny that it would be pretty cute. “Probably. It actually wouldn’t take long. What if I did one of those ones that has something silly written on the front? Like, ‘Hi Hungry, I’m Hopper.’”

“Too cute~! My dad bought my mom one that says ‘The Secret Ingredient is Always Love’!”

“I’ve heard to ‘Never Trust a Skinny Cook’. That might work on an apron. Guess we can trust Hopper’s cooking, then.” Maybe a little too far, Samuel…

“H-Hey! I heard that!”

Everyone except for Hopper giggles, even Samuel. “I’m sold, but let me give the design some thought.”

Hopper clears his throat from the kitchen. “Dinner is ready, if you three can find time to eat in your busy schedule of teasing.”

He carries out a large pot and sets it at the center of the table, allowing Samuel to set the table with bowls and forks. Two smaller pots follow, one with the homemade sauce and the other with the store-bought Tamato sauce.

Moment of truth. This dish will dictate my dietary destiny while living with Hopper…

---

“I can’t believe you held out on me this long!” Eri slams her fork on the table and excitedly looks my way. “No more fruits and no more restaurants, I’m counting on you to cook every night for the rest of my life!”

“You’re one lucky girl, Eri~!” Rosemary points her fork at me. “Good work, Hopper. Sounds like your cooking’s a hit all around. I’ll have to try the homemade stuff next time!”

Slow down, let’s not get ahead of ourselves. “Next time? How often do you-”

“This will help our funds too, Rose. We just gotta buy the ingredients and Hopper will handle the rest. No more lazy trips to Café de Indeedee.”

“I’m not your maid, you know…”

Eri wraps her arms around me, pulling me into her scarf and shielding me from view with her tail. “Yeah, you two better back off. He’s my maid, got it?”

I… didn’t agree to this either…

“Just one day a week, Eri, that’s all we ask…” Rosemary puts her leaves together like she’s praying. “Share him with the rest of us…”

“Hmm…” She looks at me and promptly releases me. “If he’s okay with it, then fine.”

Glad someone remembered my free will. “I’m not anyone’s maid. Don’t make me regret cooking to begin with.”

I didn’t think it was possible to go this crazy over just pasta.

---

“I’m taking the day off tomorrow, and you probably should too.” Rosemary talks while preparing herself for bed.

“That would be nice, yeah. We did well today, so I think we’ve all earned it.” Not only that, I’m aching from head to toe.

“Well, I won’t wake you then~!” After removing her hair tie, she tucks herself into bed. “Are the pillows comfy enough for you?”

My makeshift bed tonight consisted of a couple spare pillows from Samuel’s room. They’re not as comfy as my bed at the house, but they’ll do fine for one night. Rosemary offered to let me sleep in her bed, but I politely declined. Her bed is littered with plush toys, and the last thing I want is to be confused with one and squeezed all night.

“It’ll be fine. Thanks again.”

“No problemo. Nighty night, Eri. Good work today.”

“Yeah, you too. Good night.”

---

I made myself comfortable on the couch. Rosemary insisted that I sleep in Samuel’s room, but he seemed about as thrilled with the idea as I was. Couch isn’t the comfiest, but it’ll do.

Frankly I’m… too exhausted…

to… care…

…

I woke up feeling sore as can be. That said, I wasn’t exactly tired. Sure, I got to bed pretty late, but the clock in the house read 3:16, so I clearly slept plenty.

There’s a note on the table.

Hopper,

All three of us decided to take the day off. You’ve earned it too.
Rosemary and I went to get some groceries.
We’ll take them home sometime this afternoon, so just focus on resting and recovering today.
Samuel said he’d be at home reading. Maybe you two could hang out? Just a thought.

Oh, I didn’t find the time to say it yesterday, but good job on our first D-Rank mission.
You scared the shit out of me when you got pinned under the tail, but it wasn’t your fault.
I think I would’ve done the same thing.
And thanks for cheering me up yesterday. I really needed it.

See you tonight!
Love,
Eri

(P.S., I missed your cooking already this morning. You owe me a gourmet breakfast!)

(Double P.S., look down ^_^
-Rosemary <3)

Look down?

In place of my blanket is… an apron.

Bright pink color, with a white inscription inside of a heart.

‘Kiss the Cook’.

Eri sure works quick.