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    In a world filled with Mana, the gears are always ticking. Linus, Glade, and Nevada of Team Sharp Claw need strength to recover the Artifacts that ruined the land. Artifacts they cannot use. And so does Kobi, one of their future Teammates, one who can use them. When more Artifacts and info on mana resurfaces, what will happen? Where does that power to seal ruin lie?

    Chapter Summary

    We see things from a different perspective.

    But discovery takes time.

    All things do.

    Notes:

    Posted September 5th, 2023

    Kobi Espurr’s POV


    Why was I here?

    Why was I a Keeper when others could also bear that burden just as easily?

    I didn’t want to go through those lands and fight all these Pokémon. I just wanted to learn about the land without getting my claws dirty. But to be a Pokémon was to fight. I knew it well.

    Now it’s time I stepped up to the plate. And deliver the world from our strife, but I need to learn more about what I’m capable of. Then I could really do it. Save the world, with them.


    The dark teal mountains that made up the heartland always loomed over Hunter’s Plains, the village I lived in. Previously I never had a chance to visit them myself- the Bristberg Mountains.

    But now I finally got to take a trip into the town of Bristberg itself. And more importantly the League.

    The League was one of the first buildings I’ve ever seen to be three stories and have so many windows. In our village, the biggest building was the Elder’s meeting hall, a two-story one with only about eight. This thing had almost double that just on the entrance!

    I still didn’t believe it. This League was supposed to be this exciting place where Pokémon learned about mana and the intrigue of this world, dealing with requests and errands along the way in their research.

    But Hatchet and I just stood in front of the front barred gate and waited. The Axew rang the buzzer only a few minutes ago.

    I could have easily done it instead, albeit a bit slower, because I walked on four legs like a Skitty or Litten, not like the typical Espurr from what I’ve heard and seen. Not that I’ve ever been typical.

    Not like what we’re here for was typical either. We were both Keepers. Linus sent us a letter last week.

    ‘Hey y’all let me tell ya something.’

    ‘I quit being a Mercenary. Instead I joined the League. But it’s not like that was easy, that Entrance Exam was no joke.’

    ‘There were questions about all sorts of concepts I’ve never heard about but the Lycanroc who saved me asked a Squirtle and Pichu to help me out. I also got some assistance from a peculiar Lucario and Frogadier.’

    ‘Anyhow with their help I passed the Entrance Exam this time so now I’m an official League member! I want ya two to come here and join Team Sharp Claw with me.’

    ‘More details when you get there, love ya!

    From Linus Treecko of the Bristberg Mana Research League!’

    “Team Sharp Claw?” I asked.

    “Yes,” Hatchet replied.

    “What’s that?”

    “That’s what Linus wrote.” The Axew unraveled the letter.

    “He wants us to try out for his new Rescue Team?”

    Hatchet rubbed the back of his head just as the Treecko himself came out of the massive three-story building.

    Linus ran through the cobblestone courtyard and stopped inside of a small tower.

    The gates in front of Hatchet and I slowly parted and let us into the League courtyard. Linus poked his head out and the gates then closed.

    “I’m so glad y’all could make it!” the Treecko sped toward us in the blink of an eye with a Quick Attack and nearly knocked me over.

    I sat down on my haunches for a second to nuzzle against him. “Yeah mate, I haven’t seen you in a long time.”

    “Howdy big bro.” Hatchet patted his back. “So let’s get started. What’re we here fer?”

    As he said that, a Granbull walked out of the League building with a bundle of fabric in his arms. Immediately I tasted a soft sugary flavor all in my mouth. He’s a Keeper too. That must be how a fairy-type Keeper’s presence was!

    “Ah, Kobi, Hatchet.” The Granbull smiled. “I’m happy to see you.”

    “Oh uh.” I took a step back. Now he could taste Hatchet’s presence and my presence. As a Dragon-type the Axew’s had a strong sour flavor, but not like a sour berry. Keepers always gave him odd looks when they tasted his presence but this time was different.

    This Granbull didn’t mind Hatchet, but instead eyed me.

    Linus ran up to the Granbull and held out a hand. “This is the League’s Coordinator, Sir Cooper. He wants you guys to try out for the League and test out a new entrance Exam.”

    “What about the old Entrance Exam?” the Axew rubbed his chin.

    “It was a written and practical Exam.” the Treecko sighed. “While it was mighty rough, I managed to pass this time with help from the other Rescue Teams.”

    “Yeah, you mentioned gettin’ some help from the League before,” I said.

    “Don’t tease us! The other Rescue Teams at the League?” Hatchet asked.

    I shook my head. “He’s not taking the mick Hatchet.”

    “It sounded like he was teasing! But isn’t that kinda weird?”

    “Who else would he get help from?”

    Cooper extended a paw with a few cloths before he nodded. “Yes, with you two Linus could have a Team.”

    “Our big bro’s gonna have us on his Team?” Hatchet grinned.

    I purred at the thought. “And we can make that happen?”

    The cloths were actually striped scarves, their blue, green, and grey lined fabric accentuated by a small dark brown wooden triangular badge. “Y’all gotta wear these to come with me!” the Treecko pointed to his head, where he wore his scarf.

    I reached out for the scarf in the Granbull’s paw and Hatchet fastened it around my neck. “Come with you where?”

    “A Mystery Dungeon!” Linus cheered and grabbed my shoulder.

    “What?!”

    Cooper chuckled. “You’ll go on a few different types of requests with him, and I’ll watch your progress to see if you are ready.”

    Hatchet finally settled on a place to wear his scarf and we were back on the road, this time I followed Linus and Cooper through Bristberg.

    There were all sorts of ice, fire, water, rock, and steel-types that roamed the streets of Bristberg at this hour of the day. This was incredible! I haven’t seen some of these Pokémon in person in a long time.

    “So while we’re heading to the Bristberg Lowlands Mystery Dungeon, you should tell your siblings about the League,” the Granbull said.

    “So like in the letter I sent, the League’s full name is the Bristberg Mana Research League.” the Treecko explained. “Right now we are researching the various conditions of Mana.”

    “But you’re a Sentinel?” I asked.

    “Yeah I thought that was odd too, but it’s not like we can’t feel the world’s Mana shift, and can’t see when an attack has too much or too little mana.”

    “An attack?” Hatchet leaned close to me.

    The Treecko halted his gait a little. “Well, there were reports of outlaw Pokémon wearing black and white stripes. They attacked me and now they have been reported to target Keepers.”

    My blood ran cold. “They’ve done what?”

    “Our League helped me deal with the one that attacked me but we haven’t seen any more.”

    “Well,” the Axew shuddered out. “She and I, we ain’t seen any either.”

    “I wanted y’all to join the League so we could keep an eye out for ya,” Linus sighed.

    “We?”

    “Soon it won’t just be me looking out for you if you join my Team ya know.”

    “What do you mean?”

    “Well, y’all two aren’t the only other Pokémon the League has scouted recently.” The Treecko said as we walked through the bustling cobblestone streets.

    “Is that so?” I tilted my head.

    “Then why can’t those others join yer Team?” the Axew asked.

    “Fer starters, right now I work with a Rescue Team called Team Aegisdrip. It’s not my Team and secondly, those two, a Totodile and Charmander, aren’t ready to join a Rescue Team yet.”

    “Why’s that?” I questioned.

    The Granbull in front of us cleared his throat. “They are dealing with some things at the moment.”

    “I hope they’ll be okay.” Hatchet murmured softly.

    I nodded. “Make sure ta lookout for them.”

    “Will do, anyway, back to what the Leagues do and we are going to do.” Linus said as we exited town and headed southwest. “We go make sure the conditions of Mystery Dungeons and the surrounding areas are safe.”

    “This has to deal with the powers we use, right bruv? I never quite understood them well.” I sighed as I followed them.

    “Yes, Mana,” the Granbull explained.

    Maybe we’ll learn something about it today? Not sure how that’ll work in a Mystery Dungeon but I trusted the League.

    “Why are we going into a Mystery Dungeon?” Hatchet asked.

    The Treecko smirked as we continued down the winding path.“Ya might not have realized it, but Mystery Dungeons have Mana inside them.”

    “Wait what?!” I gasped.

    “Mana that belongs to the land itself is stabilized inside Mystery Dungeons.” Cooper pointed to the mountainside.

    Linus tugged on his bag.“It’s why Mystery Dungeon Pokémon live inside of them to keep ta balance of the mana in check.”

    “In doing that some of them have developed a new culture.” The Granbull explained. “One where they are extremely territorial and they may even speak a different language. But they’re still Pokémon like the rest of us.”

    Coordinator Cooper took us down into a slight valley of the land, the gorgeous light teal Bristberg Mountains all around us. “Could you tell them what you are doing here Linus?”

    “Today we are looking for a Pokémon who got lost on the 1st floor of Lowlands Mystery Dungeon here.” The Treecko reached into his bag. “It seems they are a Wooloo.”

    “Anything else?” My whiskers flickered. It was colder on this side of Bristberg.

    “Nope.”

    We headed further off the incline of the path into town and into the depths of the Mountain Range. Eventually, we reached a wide stretch of Mountain with a signpost in front of it. Bristberg Lowland Mystery Dungeon.

    Linus adjusted his Team bag and held out the request paper. Hatchet and I followed him toward the depths of the barely visible barrier: a darkened line of rock.

    “I’ll be waiting outside!” The Granbull waved.

    “Alrighty lets get ’em done!” The Treecko stepped inside.

    I shuddered as the path behind us vanished behind a wall of stone, and the sky grew dark. “This is- this is what a Mystery Dungeon is like?” I flattened my ears further. The path before us showed only one exit to the east. As my eyes scanned the ground I tasted something.

    It was almost like a Keeper presence. But something was off.

    “It’ll be okay Kobi.” Linus led the way into the pathway before us.

    “Wooloo!” Hatchet yelled. “Wooloo, where are ya!?”

    There was this awful feeling in the air. “What are you bloody doing?” I growled, as my hackles rose.

    The Treecko shook his shoulders. “Hatchet don’t yell so loud!”

    “Sorry.”

    I flinched as we headed into another room, it was a wide expansive mountainside, but in the corner was a white ball of fluff. It was the Wooloo. There were no other exits besides a pathway beside us.

    “Okay y’all now,” Linus stepped forward and beckoned us. “Follow me.”

    With an exhale I padded after him.

    Just as we made our move the Wooloo opened their eyes. “Get away from me!” they bleated in a soft weak voice and dashed toward us.

    The Treecko stepped in front of me and held out his arms.”Stay back!”

    The second the Wooloo got closer a wave of terrible presence crushed my entire body. “Shit!” A sharp pain tore through me and I collapsed onto the floor. “What is this!?”

    “They’re a Keeper like y’all?!” Linus questioned.

    “Kobi?” Hatchet groaned as he dropped to the ground beside me.

    I nodded. “I- I can’t move, that Pokémon.”

    “Somethin’s-” the Axew coughed and held his chest. “Something is wrong with ’em.”

    “Darnit!” The Treecko glanced at me as the Wooloo blindly rushed at us, in a bright white light. “We’re here to help you! We’re from the League!”

    The mana from their attack, probably a Tackle, grew further and further than anything I’ve ever seen. “You what?” the Wooloo skidded into a halt and slammed into Linus.

    Raw energy exploded off them and filled the air with the scent of a harsh vanilla. Normal-type mana. “We’re leavin’!” the Treecko yelled as he held onto the Wooloo, and crashed into the two of us. That same power hit directly inside my core and I couldn’t take it. I turned away from Hatchet just before I threw up.

    My vision went blurry as the Wooloo’s presence slowly shifted brighter and then dropped a little. It still wasn’t like a regular Keeper’s.

    There was a clicking noise and then a flash of blue. “That was a mighty Tackle bud. Wooloo, are you doing better?” Linus’s voice rang out.

    “I’m so sorry!” the Wooloo cried. “I didn’t mean it- I was just so scared.”

    The Treecko sighed.”It’s alright now, you’re out of the Mystery Dungeon.”

    “No, but I hurt your friends too!”

    “Oh shoot, Kobi, Hatchet!” Linus finally looked down at us. “What are you two doing!? Y’all okay?!”

    My eyes lidded open. It was bright, like how it was outside the Mystery Dungeon. A shiver passed over me as I wiped my mouth with a paw and stood up. “No, I’m not.”

    “I.” Hatchet grimaced as he also got up. “I ain’t good either.”

    “Wooloo.” While he staggered upright Linus held out his hand. “What happened to you?”

    Their hooves clattered on the ground as they paced.”You… you said you’re from the League right?”

    “Sir Cooper?” the Treecko asked as his Coordinator approached us.

    “Who?”

    “Yes, I’m the Coordinator. I need to know as well please.” The Granbull spoke up and I shuffled away from him.

    The Wooloo trembled as they looked at Cooper, and took a few steps back from Hatchet and me. They must have finally noticed our Keeper presences. “I was on a short little walk home from gathering items and… and I was attacked.”

    “I need to be able to help you further.” The Granbull knelt down and gently handed them a biscuit. “Who attacked you?”

    “Some Keepers,” the Wooloo said. “Two wearing black and white striped scarves. They had something with them- but I couldn’t see it before it was too late.”

    Cooper’s ears raised but he lowered them with a sigh.”It’s okay now. Let us get you some specialized care on what to do with your presence from here on out.”

    “Okay.”


    Cooper escorted us back to the League where he said he’d get some help for the Wooloo.

    Linus, Hatchet and I stood in the courtyard as the sunset, the sky a bright pink-orange, the gray clouds framed it perfectly.

    “So, y’all don’t want to try out more of the new League Entrance Exam?” the Treecko asked, his hands tight on his bag. “We have much more ta go over so you can form a Rescue Team with me.”

    “I’m not sure if I’m cut out for this League stuff partner,” Hatchet sighed.

    I stared at the fabrics as Linus took each scarf from our necks. “Yeah bruv, I’ll have to think about this. I’m more interested in safer research rather than going into these Mystery Dungeons and fighting.”

    “I understand. I’ll just come visit y’all. I bet Scabbard and the others want me ta come back and visit.” The Treecko laughed.

    “Yeah, I think we’ll just spend time with the folks around Hunter’s Plains.” I walked toward the gate which surrounded and blocked the League. “I’ll figure out some things and ask Ma and Pa what they know. Maybe I’ll make a friend in the village!”

    The gates began to part. “Alrighty, bye y’all!” Linus yelled.

    “See you later Linus!” I called and I trotted out of the courtyard.

    Hatchet waved his claw as the gate closed.”Take care now!”


    I never could avoid this, could I? 

    Matters of the League.

    Of the World.

    And matters of my new family. Foolishly trying to make friends. 

    But I’ll figure it out, all the mysteries regarding Mana. No, not just me. We all will.

    1 Comment

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    1. Apr 5, '24 at 7:50 pm

      Hey there! Here is my review for the Writer’s United Review Tag!

      So, I read the first 2 prologue chapters, as agreed on the #writing-chat channel on discord.

      Reviewing what I’ve read so far, I would like to first make a summary of what I’ve read, and check if it hits all the spots that you meant. Here it goes!

      In the first chapter of the Prologue, it is revealed that the Pokémon in the world are divided in two kinds: Sentinels and Keepers. Keepers are able to sense “mana” (the natural energy that is used to power moves), while Sentinels are meant to protect it. Linus the Treecko was doing some mercenary work since he didn’t have the means to become part of a Rescue Team, he ended up biting way more than he could chew with a specific mission, and he ended up having his hide saved by the Lycanroc, a Rescue Team member. Linus has this huge curiosity of learning more about mana, and by being saved by this Lycanroc, he was directed to where he could join the guild and finally fulfill his wish. Parallel to that, Keepers wearing black-and-white scarves have been able to harness way more mana than a Keeper normally can, and they have been hunting for other Keepers for an unknown reason.

      The second chapter shifts the perspective to an Espurr who is being accompanied by an Axew. Both are apparently siblings of Linus, and they also seem to have an interest in learning more about mana. They undergo a trial to join the Mana Researching Guild, but they are utmostly devastated by an emotionally unstable Wooloo Keeper who unleashes a lot of mana in a single attack, nearly knocking out all of them. The Espurr and the Axew, not willing to risk their lives in the field, give up from joining the guild, leaving Linus to figure something else out.

      Okay, that was a summary of what I’ve read, barring specifics.

      It is tough to critique when it is something that was published two years ago and the writer certainly has improved so much since then (and I say it as someone who has been keeping up with Fogcut Village). I feel like things are rushed. Like, the action is fine, but why, where, the circumstances, what Linus was feeling, none of those really speak much. It almost feels like things happen, and that’s it, with a bunch of exposition tackled in that does not contextualize us as to why we should care about Linus. His encounter with the Lycanroc also feels off, mostly because of how the Lycanroc is like “hey, this happened, join the guild if you want, it’s there. Yeah, I’ll help you unconditionally besides having met you”. It doesn’t explore much of the character’s emotions, and using 1st person doesn’t accomplish much. The same goes for Chapter 2, with things happening and being described despite the PoV character in first person not even being aware of such happenings. (specifically talking about the calming of the Wooloo).

      You have an intrigue, you have a setup, you have the world, you have the characters. I think it is a matter of slowing down and taking it easy, taking your time and words to explore the world through the feelings of the characters, and explore the feelings of the characters as they act. Because the story is headed in a good direction, and it just needs that extra ‘oomph’ to become really cool!